008: Stop blocking your own success! w/ Barbara Nixon
Stop blocking your own success!
With guest Barbara Nixon
I don’t know about you, but I am oh, so guilty of standing in my own way sometimes.
It’s super frustrating, especially when you have a really clear vision for your brand… and then you sabotage yourself for whatever reason, and that goal seems to always stay juuuust out of reach.
And that’s why I’m really excited to welcome Barbara Nixon for this week’s episode. Barbara is a success coach and business mentor. She’s also a speaker, and the author of The Boss Hat, and has been featured in Addicted2Success,Thrive Global and the BBC. As someone who has been there and worn the T-shirt when it comes to improving her own mindset, she’s now on a mission to help amazing people bust through their comfort zones, prime their mindsets for success and really step into their own power so they can achieve their goals.
Today she’ll be talking us through 5 common ways you’re blocking your own success without even realising it, and how to side step this so you can start building the brand and achieving the results you really want.
When we start to tap into the side of our comfort zone, our brain’s going “hang on a minute, come back, come back, come back.”
— Barbara Nixon
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Disclaimer: The following transcript has been auto-generated and then cleaned up by my wonderful VA – and while the general flow of the conversation is there, it’s probably not 100% accurate.
P: Hello, Barbara. Thank you so much for being here today.
B: Hey, thank you so much for having me. I’m so excited.
P: The topic that we’re going to be talking about today is one that’s close to my heart as well. So yeah, let’s do it! I know you said that life’s just too short to play small. What does that actually mean, and for those who are tuning into today’s episode, what are they going to be able to take away from today?
B: So today we’re gonna be talking about how to actually stop blocking your your own success. And this is something that I come across time and time again. To be honest, I have been there with bells on. I have definitely worn the t-shirt and I’m sure you have too, Petchy?
P: Oh, I’m still wearing the T-shirt!
B: It comes out every so often, doesn’t it? We shake it off and put it on and then and then take it off again. But, yeah, it’s something that we all do from time to time. I think it’s just part of being human. So yes, it’s important. We kind of look at it and see what we could do to start side stepping all of these blocks that come up and what we can actually do about them. I think that’s the really important thing.
P: What can we actually do about them? Because knowing about them and then not knowing what to do is almost as bad as you know…not being aware of them?
B: I think that’s probably even worse. I mean, some element of ignorance is bliss isn’t it? We don’t know what we don’t know. So this for me today is all about shining a light on these blocks so we can start to see them. And one of my favourite things to say (and I might say it quite a few times today, actually) is “spot the block”. So once you’ve started spotting that block, you can start to side step and do something about it.
P: I’m going to just hand the stage over to you, and let you talk us through what those five blocks are.
B: So before we do that, it’s important to know why we actually get some blocks in the first place. It all starts with our brain, right? Our brain’s primary function is to keep us safe, which is great when we think of it that way. But it’s just that by keeping us firmly in our comfort zone, and we probably all heard that phrase before…
P: Yes, I definitely can recognise what you’re talking about. I’ve got some gremlins as well.
B: Yeah, so the thing is our comfort zone, even though we call it comfort – it can often not be that comfortable. It’s just really more about being familiar. It’s things that we’ve done before. It’s things that we’ve experienced, it’s things that we know. And it could get really easy to stay in the familiar zone because, let’s face it, we know what that’s about and we know what to expect. And the brain loves us being there because it knows that we have survived it. We can stay safe in there – and the way that I kind of describe this and visualise this for myself is… for those of you listening that have had children or being around children:
That moment where your children are playing quite safely and in an area of the garden where you are happy with them… and then all of a sudden they go “can I play somewhere else, or can I go around at my friend’s house?” So what can I do? You might think, “Oh, crikey, I don’t know how we can make that happen.” And you might feel a moment of resistance with “how can I keep them safe as they go to do whatever it is that they want to do to stretch their legs” and your brain is going “hang on a minute. We want to keep you safe. We want to keep you in the familiar way and where I know that I could look after you.”
But the thing is that we’re not meant to stay in the familiar, right? And we don’t want to stay there. We want to grow. We want to stretch our legs, we want to evolve to all the good stuff. That’s when the exciting stuff happens – right outside of our comfort zone. But when we do that, when we start to tap into the side of our comfort zone, our brain’s going “hang on a minute, come back, come back, come back.”
And that’s when it can fire off lots of blocks that can probably happen under the radar for us. And let’s face it, it’s our brain. It knows what buttons to press to get us right back to the familiar. And this is where we really start looking out for them. Because if we’re not careful of these blocks, they could happen under the radar. They could become habits. They could become something that we just don’t recognise. It’s just part of who we are and just part of our personality.
P: What you’re saying is we need to just say to our brains, “Thanks, but no thanks.”
B: Yeah, it’s about recognising it. Right? And think “I’m just gonna do it anyway and see what happens.” But that’s easy to say. Well, we’ll start here doing this, but it’s hard in the moment because it’s happening without us even realising it. Right? So I’ve identified five really key blocks. I’ve seen it time and time again. These blocks come up all the time. I’ve experienced all of them. Maybe you have too.
P: Probably all of them.
B: Okay, we’ll be able to go “Yeah, that’s me.” And I do want to talk these through with people. I’m always going. “Yeah, I’ve done that too. I’ve done that too.”
So the first block is about the goal not being specific enough – and let me talk you through this… So let’s say that you wanted to do something. There’s something that you know, you maybe want to get more clients or you want to grow your business. So you’ve got a bit of an ambition, something that you want to do. But instead of creating a really specific goal of where you’re heading, we tend to make it nilly willy and go “Oh, I’m gonna write that book. Yeah, or I’m gonna launch a podcast, or I’m going to grow my business”… or when we look at the top level, you know.
P: I guess that’s why my podcast was on my vision board for two years without actually happening, right?
B: Yeah. It took me years to write a book because every time I‘d write my goal list, I’d just write, “write a book.” And the thing is, our brain absolutely loves a goal, right? And what we do when we create a really specific goal, it’s like putting a postcode into your GPS, so all of a sudden you know exactly where you’re heading.
But if we just put “write a book” or “launch a podcast” or “grow a business” we’re literally getting in our car and going “take me somewhere.” You’re saying that to your GPS, so you end up just not doing them because the goal is far too big. It’s too overwhelming. And it doesn’t mean anything, because we’ve not got specific. We’ve not got anything specific and tangible that we can grab hold off. So you don’t perhaps have the reasons why you want it?
What’s your why – it’s really important. We kind of get underneath it and say OK, what is it? What’s the reason behind the goal? But also what specifically do we have to do? How can you make your goal even more specific? So in the case of writing a book; how many pages are we going to write by the end of the month? How many words are we gonna write every single day? What does it actually look like? What can your postcode be that you put in your GPS? That’s really gonna light you up. It’s really gonna motivate you so that you get over that first hurdle of sitting down and thinking, OK, I’m going to do this. You can do that with anything. So, like, start a podcast. What is the first step that you need to take? And one thing I always say is that you don’t climb a mountain in one leap.
P: And quite often with these big goals… yes, we can see them. And yes, we can really want it. But what do you actually need to do? What’s the first step? Because all of these steps add up. So what’s the first? And then look for the next step and then the next step. So your big goal might be a series of goals, but it’ll lead up to where you are going. So, yeah, I totally agree with all that, and I found for myself as well, that when you start breaking that huge, really scary task down to smaller tasks, it immediately becomes a lot more manageable. I‘ll write out a list. I’ll start ticking off like, “what do I need to do first to make the next step happen? And then what do I need?” And then all of a sudden, it’s not scary anymore. Like I said with my podcast, I put it off for two years because I was terrified. I didn’t quite know what it was going to be, what kind of form it was going to take on. It was just a big mess in my head and then I started to really nail down on “why do I actually want to start this podcast? And who’s it going to be for? What’s the format I want it to be? Then what do I actually need to get it out there? What do I need in terms of tech? And what do I need in terms of external help and stuff I can outsource and… And then it became a lot more manageable. And here we are. I remember we spoke about starting podcasts, I think that on the very first time that we actually spoke, we talked about podcasts. So that’s really extra fun!
B: You’re absolutely right, it can feel very overwhelming. Because even though you’ve got this goal, it’s kind of jumbled up in your head. You know, you’re not quite sure how to get there – but it didn’t stop you thinking about it, writing it down… on your vision board or to-do list. We’ll talk about it all the time, but it’s not until we start to unpick it and think “OK, what’s actually gonna take? How can I make this decision and really put up a flag in the sand? How can I make it a reality? And what’s the first step that we can take?” that the magic happens. All of a sudden, you’ll start to feel, start to take action, which is great. So that’s block number one and we have both been there.
P: Yeah, definitely been there.
B: So Block Number two is again something that I see a lot, and that’s to keep starting again and again. I don’t know whether you can relate, but I certainly can. So this is where you want to do something in your business. Create a podcast, for instance, or maybe you want to create a new product or service or a new freebie – and then you’re almost ready to put it out into the world, and you start to have doubts, right? So you might start, saying to yourself “Oh, you know what… it’s not right. It’s not perfect. Nobody’s gonna like it anyway” or “somebody else is doing it already. And they’re doing it far better than me, and oh, yeah, I’ve got a different idea, I’m going to do that first!” And what we find is that you go back to the drawing board. And so you end up in this vicious loop of always starting something, second guessing yourself and going back to the beginning. Yeah. Can you identify?
P: Yeah. I think not as much as with the first block, but yes, I definitely have that voice in my head.
B: The key here is this kind of test: have you got anything that is hanging around on your laptop that is actually finished but has never seen the light of day? So nobody other than you has seen it. And it’s meant for other people, right? It’s not just meant for your eyes only. I know I’ve got things like that and so many people have. So then the thing is that again, this is so common and it can come up in all areas of your life, like getting fit. Or maybe you want to run a marathon or you might want to run a 10k or do an event, and you might start and then you stop and then start and stop.
And what I stress is, just have a think about it, be aware of when you stop it. You know that feeling of “it’s not perfect.” So I’m second guessing myself or something’s popping up… what does that feel like for you? And so it kind of… put yourself in that place of what does it feel like when I’m getting to the point where I’m resisting putting out into the world or finishing – and then ask yourself why you stop? What’s the real reason? Because you’ll tell yourself a reason like “oh, somebody else is doing it better. Or I’ve had a better idea, or it’s not the right time.” You’ll tell yourself something like that, but in actual fact, there will be an underlying reason and it’s usually fear. And you mentioned this already with your fear of the podcast. Did you have a fear of people listening to it or?
P: Absolutely. The worst, the worst fear is of people I know listening, like my family or my close friends. It’s like I’ve got this really weird fear that they’re going to say, “look, you sound like an idiot.” I don’t worry so much about the strangers… because they’re strangers. But the people whose opinions really matter to me… I won’t let my other half listen to it. And I mean, he probably has listened to it, but on his own, in secret. When I can’t see.
B: Yeah. And it’s so It’s so true, isn’t it? When I wrote and published my book, I didn’t want anybody to read it. Yeah, it was… it just felt really strange every time somebody read it. I don’t want them reading my book, but it was obviously meant to be read.
P: It’s a weird sensation, isn’t it? You have two thoughts in your head at the same time, and one voice is saying, “you need to get this in front of as many people as possible. Get all those downloads, get all those reads,” you know? And then the other voice in your head is like, “no, please, nobody listen! It’s all right. I’ll just keep it to myself.” So, yeah, you’re right, and it’s kind of crazy doing this too.
B: Well, you know… again, it’s a way of us staying safe, isn’t it? But look for what the real reason is. What is it that you’re actually afraid of – and then face it. And remember, confidence comes from action. One of my all time favourite quotes is “confidence is a memory of action.” You have to go through that process in order to grow in confidence.
P: There’s definitely something to the saying “doing it scared” because once you’ve actually done it, it’s not so scary anymore.
B: Yeah, exactly! Are you as scared of people listening now, now that your podcast is out in the world?
P: No, I’m still not totally comfortable with my partner listening, or my mum. It’s just nice to have it done, and that’s my experience with a lot of other things that have scared me as well. It’s like it’s a lot scarier before you’ve actually done it. And then once you’ve done it, you kind of think, “why did I let that hold me back, that wasn’t so bad?”
B: Yes, but at the time it feels it. You could really feel it and that’s the thing it’s about. It’s just about accepting that. That’s how you grow confidence. It’s just like getting fit. Yeah, we know that in order to get fit, we have to go and do something. Whatever your chosen form of exercise is you have to go for a run or go to the gym – and you’re not gonna just get fit by sitting on your sofa.
P: I wish!
B: Me too, that would be super cool. But it’s just the same with confidence. We’re not gonna get confident just by sitting and wishing for it and hoping for it. We have to actually go out and do the thing. And yes, that might feel scary. But that’s how you grow.
P: And also, I think that’s one reason why having conversations such as the one we’re having now is really, really important. Because I know for me… when I started hearing other business owners saying that they had these feelings, too, they were shit scared of doing stuff, too, and they were much further along in their business journey. Then I was like, “aren’t they supposed to be over it by now? Well, if they’re not over it yet, it must be OK for me to feel like that too” – and that, on its own just makes it easier. So that’s why I was really excited about this episode, because I want other people to experience that too. You know that realisation of how it’s always going to stay with you. This feeling it’s not gonna go away, and you’re just gonna have to learn to deal with it and be comforted by the fact that so many other business owners are feeling the exact same thing.
B: Yes, absolutely. There’s a great saying that says “new level, new devil” and I love that saying because it’s so true. And if you think back to what we said right at the very beginning of this episode… with your comfort zone. If you think of your comfort zone as a circle around you, you’re at some point as you grow, always gonna be bumping up the side of it, right? So as people move, your brain’s gonna go through the same motions and and it’s just about recognising it, spotting the block as it pops up going “oh, hello! Okay, so we’re gonna deal with this now, and that’s all right.” And it just becomes part of what we do. Yeah. Practice makes perfect.
P: Totally
B: And you know what? This isn’t new. It’s probably that we’re more conscious of it because we’re doing new things more often. But if you think back to your entire life, you know, you’ve been doing new things all the time. So you learnt to walk and you learnt to read. You went to school for the first time. All of that was pushing your comfort zone and you got through it. So this is just another thing.
Let’s just move on to block number three – my all time favourite, actually, because this was the one that really held me back: excuses.
P: Oh, yes. Hello Excuses, my old friend!
B: Mine too. Oh, yeah. Excuses. So this is how it plays out. Let’s say you want to launch a podcast, or you want to write a book. You want to do something, grow your business. Whatever it might be for you. Instead of going “OK, we’re gonna do this. Let’s let’s start!” all of a sudden, all of these amazing excuses will pop into your head or stumble out of your mouth. Things like “I’m too busy. I don’t have time right now. I haven’t got the money. I can’t spend that money. I don’t have the right qualifications or I need more experience or I’m just not ready. Or I’ll do it tomorrow. I’ll start tomorrow. I’ll do it the next time or another day.”
And my favourite, back in the day going back many years now, was: “I’ll do it when the kids are older.” I used to say that all the time. My kids wouldn’t have cared. You know as long as they’re looked after. Well… I’ve got three of them that are in their twenties now, so they really don’t care whether I do something or not. It’s funny, isn’t it? Where we all have these excuses because the thing is with excuses is that it can feel like reasons – they could feel like genuine reasons why we’re not doing something.
P: And some of them can be real reasons as well, which is why I think it’s so difficult to distinguish between an excuse and a reason, because sometimes they totally overlap. I know they do for me.
B: Yeah, totally. But I’ve got this belief that we all secretly know when it’s an excuse. I have a test as well, which I’ll share with you in a second. But the thing is… that it’s a reason if it’s a genuine reason and that’s okay, we don’t have to do everything. Put something off if it’s a reason, if you genuinely can’t do it at that point.
But like I said, we’ll secretly know whether it’s an excuse or not. An excuse is a great way to hold ourselves back and keep ourselves stuck or in the same place. So my test is this: I want you to think of the thing that you’re not doing because you’re maybe putting it off or you’ve got an excuse… So you got something in mind Petchy?
P: Uh, not right now because I’ve just done what I was making excuses for. I mean, one excuse that I did have to challenge myself on was not knowing how to do the tech side of things. And I mean, that’s completely stupid because I could either learn how to do it. I mean, hello, Google. Or I could outsource. So I think it just had an easy solution either way.
B: Yeah, So it kept you stuck, didn’t it? So once you have thought of what that excuse or reason is, then let’s pretend that you are going to get a delivery of a million pounds in a box, or it is going to go straight to your bank account if you do the things that day, right?
So let’s say you’ve immediately said yes. Yes, I’ll do it. I will do the thing that I’m putting off. If I knew that a million pounds would magically drop at my doorstep for doing it all of a sudden… then you know it’s an excuse. We know immediately that it’s an excuse. And the reason being is that all of a sudden, now we’re focusing on the outcome. We’ve looked over that bridge, right? And we’ve looked at the other side, and I’m gonna harvest the benefits of doing this. It’ll be short term pain for long term gain. I’m going to get rewarded for this. So with your podcast, you know that if you do that today… yes, it might be a hassle, yes, it might be a bit of focus or a bit more time or, you know, there’ll be a bit of effort that goes into it. But on the other side of the bridge, you’re going to get rewarded. What’s happening then, is that we’re focusing on the effort. We’re focusing on the actual task. We’re not focusing on the reward. Every single thing that we do is gonna have some rewards. So it’s gonna have some benefit. Otherwise you wouldn’t be doing it.
So if you find yourself just coming up with an excuse and you’re not quite sure whether it’s an excuse: do that test and I guarantee we’ll get you out of that place. And then just look over that bridge and say, OK, what is it that is my reward? Why do I actually want to do this, what is the benefit? What is my version of the million pounds dropping into my bank account? What is that? What does that look like? And it works absolutely every single time.
P: I’ve got I’ve got a question. Might be a bit of a tricky one, it’s just popped up in my head:
What do you do if the end goal that you really, really want is also something that’s really scary too? If you actually get there, and the end result is scary too – then what do you do?
B: It’s like what we were talking about earlier in terms of being stuck in the loop. Just unpick that a little bit and think, “what is it that I’m really scared of?” and you’ll probably get to the point where you were, which is “I don’t want people to listen to it.”
Okay, well. What if that happens? If they do listen to it. What is the benefit? Because it doesn’t always have to be negative. You know, positive stuff can happen too, so actually somebody listens to it. Well, I might help them. It might really help somebody. You might get new clients. You might grow your business. You might. Somebody might change their life. As a result, somebody might, you know, do something completely different.
Right. Block number four. And again, this is one that’s close to my heart. This is all about not having the confidence to be visible in your business. So you want to be visible, maybe posting on social media, you might want to do some FB lives. You might want to do what I’m doing now and be a podcast guest – and if you’re not careful, you can get stuck in a stop/start pattern. I don’t know whether you’ve ever been there, but you know when you have all the right intentions, and you know the benefits of growing your audience and putting yourself out there and being visible… and you do it for a little while and then go “oh, no, no, I don’t want to annoy people. I don’t want to spam people. I don’t want to be all over the place and people think I’m annoying…” And so you stop. And then something makes you start again and then you stop. And if you’re not careful again, you can go on this roller coaster of stop, start, stop, start.
But the thing is that… and this is important, right: It’s all about growing your confidence. But I’ll tell you a story, which really helped me: So I remember I started my business back in 2010 and that was before Facebook lives. And don’t even think I was on Facebook back then. I was about to do a webinar, and I think they were still called Webinars back then, but we certainly didn’t have anything fancy. There were about 100 people that were joining this webinar, which was a lot for me in those days, and I suddenly started to feel really nervous.
And I thought “Oh, what if they don’t like me? What if I say something that’s not right?” And it was all about me. And in that moment before I started I walked into my daughter’s bedroom, she was probably around twelve at that time, and I sat on her bed. She was busy writing in a diary or a journal or reading a book or something… as teenagers do. And I sat on the bed and I said “I’m so nervous. I’m about to do a webinar in front of 100 people. And what if they don’t like me. What if I say something rubbish? What if I am rubbish? What if I just mess up?” And without missing a beat, she said… As only teenagers do, she said: “You’re not Madonna, get over yourself.” And it was the exact slap-down I needed at that point, right? Because what she really said was… you know, it’s not about you.
It’s about service. These people had showed up because they wanted to learn something. And it didn’t have to be me delivering the message. It just happened to be me delivering the message. And it could have been anybody. They had spent £70 on tickets, and I was somebody that was showing up to teach something that they needed to learn. At that point, it was all about service. It was “how can I actually show up and be of service to them?”
P: So if you haven’t got a teenager in the house, how can you get the same effect?
B: Yeah, we’ll focus on the same thing. The message is still the same. So what? Have you ever been in a situation where you scroll in mindlessly on social media and all of a sudden you come across something, whether it’s a post or a video or a quote or whatever it might be… and you stop for a second and go “I needed to hear that today.”
I know that’s happened to me so many times, and that’s what it’s all about. It’s not about saying something that’s particularly unique, it’s not rocket science. It’s about saying something in the way that you say it that somebody else needs to hear at that point, and that’s why we show up. It’s for that one person scrolling right now that just needs to hear what you’re about to say – and once you actually reframe and focus on service, about focusing on that one person, then all of a sudden it just becomes so much easier. So have a go with that and see what happens.
P: I think that’s gonna help a lot of people listening, actually. Just shifting the focus from it being about you to it being about them.
B: Yeah, and that was so powerful for me, and a lesson that I’ve used time and time again. Because you do have moments where you think “I don’t want to show up today. I don’t want to do a live today. I don’t want to post that video.” We all have moments like that. But then that’s when you need to think “Who needs to hear it? Who? Who needs to hear it right now?” And once we get that, then it just becomes easier.
Okay, let’s move on to block number five, which is our final block today, which is getting busy on the small stuff. So this is where you’ve got this big to do list. And you do all the teeny tiny tasks first. You know the 10 minute tasks, like email. Phone this person and send a document. awful when you know the tiny tang because then you can take them off. When you feel like you’ve achieved something great, doesn’t it find
P: I don’t know if I’m the only person to do this, but I will quite often make a to do list… and I will add a few things that I’ve already done, too. So I can tick that shit off right away.
B: I do that too.
P: Good, then it’s not just me!
B: And I also put on, and this probably takes what you said to another level… I don’t do this anymore. But I used to put on things like, you know… brush teeth. And it kind of fools us into feeling busy, that we’re actually getting stuff done, but busy doesn’t equal productive. Right? And this is not what’s gonna move the needle for you, whether it’s in your business or whether it’s achieving your goals or whatever that might be for you. It’s not gonna get you closer to that. It’s just going to keep you firmly stuck – and yes, you might feel busy, but you’re not doing the thing or taking the actions that’s gonna get you closer to where you want to be.
So if this is where you are, just finish listening to this, and then glance down at your to-do list and just say “OK… what have I actually done today that’s moved a needle in my business or got me closer to my goals?” And it’s about honesty, not just about discipline, and looking to see what you’re spending your time on. But also picking that one thing… So whether it’s starting a podcast or writing a book or whatever… it might be that that’s one thing I guarantee you will know that you are avoiding and that it is gonna take a little bit more effort or more time or focus.
But once you start, it’s gonna really get you closer to your goal much, much faster. And think “Where is that on my to do list? How much of my day am I dedicating to that one thing?” Even if it’s 15 minutes, right. It doesn’t matter if that’s all you can spare. 15 minutes a day focusing on your big goal is time well spent because it’ll chip away at it. But yeah, I have a think about what it is that you’re putting off. You need to start today.
P: I love it. And also, I think for me, what’s really helped is that matrix, of “is this important? Do I have to get this done fast or is there something I can put off? Is it urgent? Important or urgent and important?” And like yeah, sorting it.
B: Yeah. I love that. Yeah. And what I do is, every single task before I start it, I ask myself “what goal is this helping me get towards?” And if it’s not something specific, then do I need to be doing it? Because quite often these teeny, tiny tasks that we like to do, we can batch them together and do them when we’ve got a bit of an energy low. We don’t need all our super brain power to do it. So I batch them together and do them, you know, in the afternoon or whatever it is for you. For me, it’s in the afternoon where I’m having a bit of a lull in energy and think, OK, I don’t need brain power right now, but I still let’s get things done so I can rattle them off in, you know, half an hour.
P: And then it feels good.
B: Right? You feel good. And so I’d love to know Petchy, which was your favourite block that you resonate with most?
P: Just recap quickly for us? What are the five blocks?
B: What did we have? We had…
Setting specific goals
Excuses
Starting again
Being visible
Getting busy on the small stuff
P: Do I have to pick just one? I’m guilty of so many. But I think that excuses is one… and the visibility one? And then because of those, I think getting busy on the small stuff.
B: Yeah, I completely agree and I would probably say they were my biggest ones, too – and so easy to fall into. Right? But once we’ve spotted them, it’s time to start sidestepping them. But spotting the block is absolutely the first step. Just start to notice them, see what’s what. What’s out there? What’s coming up for you as “A-ha! Yes, I’m doing that thing she talked about! What can I do instead?” So I hope that was helpful for you.
P: I think this would be helpful to so many of my listeners. I know it’s helpful for me and I know that these kind of blocks have a tendency of feeling so big and monumental that I don’t know how I can actually get over them until I start breaking them down into smaller and more manageable bits.
B: Yes, absolutely. That’s the key – to just to make it, um, just a lot less scary by cutting it right down to its very basic form. What is the smallest step that you can take right now? But all of those small steps really do add up.
P: Yeah, and list lovers are gonna love this. You could take a big thing, and then, like breaking into a smaller list of to-dos, and, then you can do that for each one of those big blocks, and then you’ve got a list-o-rama, right?
B: Yeah, we can joke about it, but it definitely does help to break things down.
P: So just to round off, if you could give my listeners just one single, easily actionable tip – something that they could implement today to stop standing in their own way. What would that be?
B: Great question. So today I’d love to invite you to just look at your to-do list and ask: “what is it on that list that’s actually getting me closer to my goals?” And if it’s not on there or if it’s something that you’re avoiding, then I invite you to just put it on there and see what comes up for you and dedicate some time to start spotting those blocks. And as we said earlier, just think about what is the very, very smallest step that you can take to get you closer to that goal – even if it’s just putting on trainers on and going for a short run. Or if it’s, you know, just exploring and being curious and researching your goal, whatever that might be. Just think about what is the first step that I can take so that it’s no longer something that you want to do. But it’s something that you’re actually doing, you’re actually on with it.
P: Brilliant. So if people who are listening today want to connect with you, where is the best place for them to find you?
I am on all the places, but come and hang out with me on Instagram. So come and find me there and also on Facebook as well.
P: I happen to know that you have a free toolkit too, please tell us about that?
B: Yes! If you do fall into that trap of not being consistently visible and you want to be, this is a toolkit that I created for myself years ago and it worked so, well. It’s all about helping you to be consistently visible so you can show up every day and not have that stop/start pattern that we all tend to fall into.
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